I Do It For You
by Melethiel
Summary: River and Simon go shopping in between jobs. River is aware of danger approaching, and tries to protect Simon, but how can she, when she's a raving mental patient, and he doesn't know it's there? Rating for safety.


A/N: First Firefly fic! Yay! I had a lot of fun writing this, 'cause I'm ABC, (Australian Born Chinese) and I could use a few phrases I already use in everyday life. I put in quite a bit of Mandarin (I'm pretty sure that's what they use in the series), but the last long phrase by Simon, I'm not sure if that's Mandarin. My house is a scary mix of Mandarin, Malay, Hokkien and English. I have trouble distinguishing between the languages (wasn't well educated – or I just didn't want to learn.) I put translations at the bottom – Enjoy! 

I based River's speech pattern on mine – I talk like that when I'm feeling particularly depressed, happy, or just out of it. And in my mind.

* * *

"River, what do you think of this? _Ni xi huan ma_?"

"Tall girls. All green. Green dancers. Have no choice. Must dance. Because he comes among them and beats them until they do. He beats them and bruises them and kills them until they dance. They dance, and twirl but never move, because their feet stay in the ground… No escape… Must dance…"

River Tam seemingly ignored her brother's question, wandering off to stroke a painted porcelain plate, covered with a landscape – sweeping plains and long grass.

The doctor sighed. She was hard enough to understand at the best of times, but when she incorporated words such as 'kill', 'beat' and 'bruise' into her ramblings, he felt so useless and helpless, and had absolutely no idea what to do.

"Come on, _mei-mei_…" He gently put his hand on her arm.

"River is inside you. They put the river in, and they bring it out. Bring it out…"

He wanted to understand, but she was talking nonsense to him. His mind could handle logic, complex equations, theories. The simplest sentence from her had him stumped. Shakespeare made more sense than River.

River looked at him serenely. She understood more than they thought. She knew, just couldn't relate her knowledge to her body. It was like halfway through the signal got jammed, twisted and distorted. She knew what her brother must be feeling. She wanted to help. But her superior mind was trapped in eternal torment and anguish, disconnected from the world.

She stared sadly at the plate. Her hand, almost against her will, jerked out to grab it. 'Grass', she had wanted to say. 'It reminds me of home. The big field next to our house, where I used to dance.' That, to her was what she had said. Though, judging by Simon's reaction, he had heard something less endearing.

It was difficult. She disliked being treated as a child. He didn't know any other way to treat her. Her body and mouth said one thing, her mind screamed another. And he was trapped, trying to stretch himself to accommodate for her mind and body at the same time.

She was thankful to him for protecting her, and trying to fix her. Her only regret was that she couldn't do the same.

All she could do was scream.

* * *

There were upsides to Kaylee's and Inara's shopping fever. While usually it lost the ship a lot of money on 'unnecessary luxuries' (although if you asked her, Kaylee would say that lavender soap and oil is a necessity), they spent quite a bit of time flirting and scouting for information on jobs in every shop they visited. Which was… every shop. So if one were to go shopping anytime they were topside, they would inevitably run into Inara or Kaylee. Usually sooner rather than later if said person was staying still.

In this instance, both shoppers were staying very, very still.

"Simon!"

"River!"

"Hi, Kaylee, Inara. Could you please wait outside for us?"

The two girls surveyed the scene in horror. River was holding a broken shard of porcelain in each hand, her left hand held out at arms' length defending herself from outside intruders. Her right hand held the shard at Simon's throat.

"Simon, what's going on?"

"Well, River decided to scream and smash a plate, use the shards as weapons, attack me, and cause the store owner to disappear really, really quickly."

"Any idea why?"

"I don't think she liked the plate."

River felt a bit affronted that no one asked her what happened. I mean, she was the one holding the weapons! She waved the shard toward the girls in order to demonstrate. This only succeeded in making them back up nervously. It was fairly simple to her. She had felt them. They were coming. So she had to make sure that Simon stayed still, for his own good. Otherwise they would get them. As soon as they exited the store, they would get him. She couldn't live with that. So she used the only language that she could rely on now. Body language.

It worked surprisingly well, considering that he knew how to put her to sleep. He was probably didn't want to risk it. She would be really mad when she woke up. And maybe even kill him before he even finished the words.

Of course they wouldn't understand that. So she had to explain.

"They are will find us. Two by two, hands of blue… Two by two, hands of blue…"

Kaylee and Inara looked at each other, despairingly. Now was not the time for her to have a paranoid breakdown. Although, to be fair, it's not really paranoia if they really are out to get you.

"Will you please meet us outside?"

"No way! We aren't leaving you alone!"

"It's my sister, not a bomb."

"Maybe, but she's about to go all medieval on your ass if something isn't done!"

Simon gave up. Women were incredibly stubborn.

"_Mei-mei_? _Mei-mei_, put down the… sharp thing."

River was on the verge of panic. She could feel them! And just thinking about them…

"Two by two, hands of blue. Two by two, hands of blue."

She started shaking, sweating. She won't go back, she won't! The shard slipped slightly – she shifted her grip, her palms sweaty, her eyes wild.

"_Mei-mei? Wo shi ne de qe qe._ You don't want to hurt me. I think. Please put down the sharp thing. _Na hui shang hai hi de._ And we don't want that."

"_Xiao xin_!"

"I'm doing my best!"

"Alright, alright, no need to get all touchy."

"My sister's about to kill me – I reserve the right to be a bit snappy."

"They're coming."

"River, nobody's coming."

Hah. Shows how much he knew.

She could feel them. The were everywhere! Searching, searching.

Then suddenly they were gone. They couldn't find them, so they left. Assumed it was a false lead. They were to scour another planet for the fugitives. But River only relaxed when she felt their ship leave the atmosphere.

"River? River?"

She dropped to the floor, sobbing. It took so much out of her. She couldn't do it all the time. And they didn't understand. They just didn't understand. Simon knelt in front of her, cautiously. He hadn't felt them. He didn't know what they could do. The things they did. They made her mind so clear but so confused at the same time. He didn't know.

"_Mei-mei_, give me the sharp things." He was concerned. But he didn't understand.

River just dropped the plate shards and threw herself into his arms, sobbing.

"Shh, shh… _Aiya_, _mei-mei_, what happened?"

'I felt them. They were coming for us. I had to hide you.'

"Two by two, hands of blue. Two by two, hands of blue." She mentally cursed her tongue as Simon continued to pat her reassuringly on the back, rocking her back and forth.

"It's okay, it's alright, nobody's going to hurt you, you're safe."

Kaylee and Inara watched the scene awkwardly from the door, unsure of what to do.

"Kaylee, can you please return to the ship? Mal will want to know that we caused a shop owner to _xi obiàn_ in his good_ chángkùzi._"

"Even when you swear you're so formal," smiled Kaylee as she left, albeit reluctantly.

"I'm not formal! I use strong language!"

Inara bit her lip to refrain from remarking on the phrase 'strong language'. "Not something to be proud of, doctor."

"_Bì zuî_!"

Inara just smirked at the overly polite doctor and followed Kaylee out, leaving brother and sister alone.

Simon looked at his sister for a long moment. Her eyes skirted around guiltily. He then sighed, smiling.

"I swear, if you weren't my sister… _Gua goreng lu nya puntat_!"

River laughed through her tears, squirming as her older brother pretended to be mad, tickling her until she was reduced to a giggling heap. She understood perfectly.

"Come on, I'll leave some money and a note for the store owner, then we'd better haul ass, in case he wants to start a law suit."

River just watched as he rummaged around for paper and a pen.

Simon stops the red. She starts it. With him gone, there would be too much red. Too much for her to handle. With her gone, he would become redundant. She couldn't ever loose him. And he couldn't loose her. They were two parts of one whole. Together, they tried to stop the red.

She was hiding her friends, but she couldn't forever. He helped if ever she slipped up a little. He stopped the red. But she knew one day she would fall. They would find her. They would come. And when they did, there would be red. Lots and lots of red.

And neither of them would be able to stop it.

* * *

_Ni xi huan ma – Do you like it?__Mei-mei – little sister_

_Wo shi ne de qe qe – I am your older brother._

_Na hui shang hai hi de. – That can hurt you._

_Xiao xin – Be careful_

_Aiya – Oh man/Crap etc._

_xi obiàn - urinate_

_chángkùzi – trousers_

_Bì zuî – shut up_

_Gua goreng lu nya puntat – I'll fry your ass (loosely – I'm not sure about the 'I'll'. Just a common insult I use a lot. I wrote it phonetically.)_

A/N: Hope you enjoyed! Please review, if you have time. Thank you for reading!


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